Otherwise known as: Which airline is the stingiest? Southwest comes out on top for its fee-lessness, followed by Virgin. US Airway’s new $2 water fee puts it at the bottom of the pile.

Much as I like to complain about flying, the new Emirates A380, complete with showers and 1,000 channels of entertainment, might actually be a pretty nice experience. Here’s an account of one person’s trip on the new luxury liner.

Why don’t I ever get invitations like this??

It was just two years ago that Northwest started the airline nickle-and-diming by charging for aisle seats and emergency row seating. Interesting, in a time-machine sort of way, is that, at that time, American Eagle had tried and given up on charging for sodas because no one bought them. Now, of course, US Air is charging for water, and JetBlue is charging $7 for a pillow.

What’s next? I shudder to think, though the industry listservs this morning were talking about vending machines and all sorts of other ways to make a quick buck on board. Flying just couldn’t get much more fun, could it (she says sarcastically)?

Update: Just found this post from someone who not only thinks this is a great trend, but that JetBlue should charge more for its blankets and pillows.

A couple of items in this morning’s Boston Globe caught my eye: First is this article about what happens to the loose change that people don’t remember to pick up on the other side of security. It goes to pay for screeners and equipment. From the article:

The TSA has been allowed to pocket the change since 2004 when it lobbied Congress to change the law so the money could be used within the organization instead of going to a general fund in the federal treasury. Since then, the nickels and dimes have been adding up: Between Sept. 30, 2004, and Oct. 1, 2007, the TSA accumulated more than $1 million from 450 US commercial airports - a tiny fraction of its $18 billion budget.

And then there’s this one about how Dinner in the Sky, a Belgium-based company that offers the view without the room by hauling diners, table, food, and servers 180 feet in the air by crane, is coming to the U.S. Frankly, just thinking about it makes my stomach flip-flop, but I guess it might be the ultimate experience for a group with no fear-of-heights-challenged members.

And speaking of making my stomach uneasy, someone who shall remain nameless sent me a link to this video for Extended Stay Hotels. It’s a little sleezy, very uncomfortable, and made me want to whoops my coffee. So of course, I have to share it with you, with a warning that you really probably don’t want to watch it.

And via a Twitter tweet from Guy Kawasaki, I learned about a travel-booking site I hadn’t heard of before: ESkyGuide.com. I haven’t had time to play with it yet, but I plan to check it out.

It’s interesting to peruse through the responses to Fast Company’s Big Idea: “Within five years, technology will obliterate the need for business travel.”

As I expected, there are 22 commenters who agree, and 92 who don’t. Make that 93 as I cast my vote (or try to. The darn system keeps booting me out for some reason). But as the technology gets better and travel gets worse (both financially and experientially), I think it will make a dent in nonessential business travel. So as long as your meetings are really, really good, they’ll still come. But they better be really, really good.

Now that airlines are charging for checking first, second, and third bags (and just wait, carry-on probably will carry a fee as well, the way things are going), Wired did a little calculating and found that, in some cases, it’s cheaper to ship your bags than take them on board the plane with you. As they so nicely put it: Save a Buck, Stick it to the Airlines.

If you don’t want to put your fluids in a little baggie to make it through airport security, the good folks at Jaunted have spotted Paper Shampoo “an invention similar to breath strips that involves wetting a rectangular sheet of paper impregnated with shampoo and rubbing it on your head.”

Thankfully, I usually stay at hotels that provide shampoo of the liquid variety so if I forget to BYOS, I don’t have to resort to this, but what the heck.

“Word of mouse,” meaning, I think, marketing through social networking. It came from this New York Times article on social media and business travelers. It’s a pretty interesting read all the way around. From the article:

Both Expedia and American Express Business Travel are announcing their new offerings this month. The Internet travel site Orbitz had one of the first networking sites, but it, too, is trying to increase participation by sending out e-mail messages to members to promote its Traveler Update.

If they do figure out a way to pull it all together, this could be terrific. We’ll see how it goes.

A new article from tech guru Corbin Ball talks about the recent cutbacks, layoffs, fees, etc., going on in the airlines these days, and how it could affect attendance at meetings. On the plus side, he says,

* The relationship-building and networking occurring at events is difficult to replicate online (at least with the current level of technology).
* There are efficiencies of scale at tradeshows and events – it is possible to make many contacts whose business benefits will continue to outweigh substantial travel cost and hassle for many.
* A primary revenue source for most associations is events and tradeshows. The attendee numbers may go down, but events will stay as long as the association is operating.
* There is an isolation factor – the more we work in front of computer screens and/or telecommute for small offices, the more we will desire human contact.

But as air travel gets more difficult and expensive, it could be the breaking point for many attendees. Corbin lays out some “telepresence meeting solutions” that planners perhaps ought to be paying attention to–if you’re not already, that is.

If I owned an airline, I’d do my best to eliminate all those fees, but some people think differently. Take David Owen, whose My Airline piece in the latest New Yorker got me hooting. I particularly like the idea of charging $50 to the person who lowers their seat, payable to the person behind them.

He may be joking, but this news item isn’t: Spirit to charge for seat assignments.